One thing that you will want to do is tour your NICU before you deliver. You can tour the facility, meet some of the staff, learn about the protocols when coming in and out, and ask questions. It will be a huge sigh of relief once you do. It takes a lot of the guessing out of what to expect after your babies arrive.
If you are anything like me, you will get there and your brain will freeze. Seeing all the tiny babies in incubators can do that to you. Here are some questions to ask (take this list in and they will be happy to answer!): *this exact list was provided to fellow triplet moms in a Facebook group. Like I said, these moms are amazing. Most of these questions I would have never thought to ask and so badly wish I did.
1) What happens after they’re born? Where do they go? Where do I go? How long should I expect to wait before I can see them? Will my husband see them earlier?
2) What are the rules as far as when my husband and I can visit?
3) What are the guidelines for other visitors?
4) Do you support kangaroo care (skin-to-skin)? What are the requirements for the babies’ health to start?
5) How involved can we be with general care of the babies: feeding, bathing, etc.?
6) What kind of monitoring/monitors do the babies have?
7) Can I pump at the hospital while I’m visiting? Can the hospital provide a pump for me?
8) Do you have a donor breast milk program for the period before my milk comes in?
9) Knowing they’ll be in the NICU, should I bring any supplies for the babies when I come to the hospital to deliver or is everything initially provided for me?
10) Do you rent breast pumps and do they have lactation consultants work with me right away?
11) What are the rates of complications for different gestational age and how serious are each of those complications? **(I left this on the list…but I personally believe this should be a question for your doctor. The NICU nurses aren’t going to feel comfortable answering something like this…in my opinion. I would keep questions directed towards the facility and not about possible complications with the health of your babies. Those are for the doctors that are familiar with your situation.)
12) What are the discharge requirements?
13) If I spend the day at the hospital do I need to eat my meals in the cafeteria? Is outside food allowed?
14) Do parents ever spend the night at the NICU? How does that work?
15) Will the babies be in the same room together? How many other babies are in the same room? Can we bring personal items?
16) Will we have the same primary doctor during our stay? How many neonatologists are there in the unit?
17) If the babies are discharged at different times, can the other babies come back with me when I visit?
18) Can siblings visit the babies in the NICU?
Questions I’d like to add:
19) I understand that the staff assigning is out of our control and certain nurses are needed based on how sick other babies are, but if there is a particular nurse that meshes well with us and is great with the babies, can we ask to have him/her as a primary nurse? And can we decline certain nurses/doctors from taking care of them? (unfortunately, we had several nurses and a doctor we had to put on a “no” list. You have every right to advocate for your babies when you think they aren’t being taken care of like they should). I’ll have posts coming soon on this topic.
20) What time are “rounds” typically and can I attend? (Ps, you CAN but it helps to ask so they know you will be there. I attended rounds many times to make my voice heard about things…mainly when I was having an issue about something.
There are going to be a lot of nurses and doctors taking care of your babies (they can’t work 24/7/365) so they tend to roll past your room with their computers and say “Okay, here is Espino B2….bla bla bla…” and recommend treatment based on their statistics and graphs. Your primary doctors and nurses, who know your babies like their own, may not be there to advise against that treatment for whatever reasons.
Bottom line, try to come to rounds as often as you can. This will give you a full run-down on their status and you can make sure you are all on the same page. Remember, YOU are a voice for your babies.
Modify this list as much as you want to and bring it in to the NICU when you go. You’ll feel a lot better about what to expect and where you’ll be spending a lot of time.
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